......

two seconds after i posted this it died............

introducing

our new bird. he or she has no name yet. it´s the size of a small peanut! this is actually exactly what harrison ford looked like when he was little.

the mom hatched four eggs but not on the same day. so this lil guy had three gigantic bros and was not getting fed. so, we had to intervene. i will take pics lots and u can see his or her growth!

Spains Eurovision 08 entry....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d2sun973nfY

¡watch this!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GJWNPYXIA9E

hearing Donald Trump say ¨zapatos¨ priceless.

CA telephone pole

California Telephone PollThe latest telephone poll taken by the California Governor's office asked whether people who live in California think illegal immigration is a serious problem:

29% of respondents answered: "Yes, it is a serious problem."

71% of respondents answered:
"No es un problema serioso."

safe sex prom dress

.........

I hate when my computer freezes and everything is lost....ugh.

Back to work today. The transition was easy since the kids were good. Only three almost puked on me......I send them away when their faces start to turn green.

Neighbor war is on. The joys of living in a flat. I sleep late because tappy dance lady woke me up at 3am dancing. How does anyone have energy to be dancing at 3am? Don´t you hear the pillow calling your name lady? GO TO SLEEP. I don´t even know her and I can´t stand her. I´ve gone to her house once to ask her to turn down the music andI know several other people have complained. In my book she´s just a bad person with no respect for others.

Then every morning I hear EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK from the clothing lines of my other neigbor. It´s called oil people. Lube it up. I might take a bottle over myself.

I have a crazy neighbor named Antonio that lives right above us. He talks to you without ever looking at you and he never stops talking.....ever. A crazy HIV infested drug taking lady cleans the stairs for me every Monday. I pay her three euros. She hangs with Antonio neighbor guy. So, they rang my doorbell today and the next thing I knew they were in my bathroom looking at the ceiling (because it´s leaking again thanks to crazy Antonio neighbor). Well, come on in, I thought to myself....how odd. They could at least ask. And then they got into a fight, in my living room, and I was trying to leave for work. I tried to get them out the door and he kept pushing it open trying to talk to me. I think that´s why he never looks at anyones face while he talks to them, because with the evil eyes I was giving him he would be dead.

sweet video

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UOQ5kn8YS8k

happy easter!

The tomb is empty, He has risen! What an amazing reason to celebrate. Happy Easter!

charles!

New pics of Charles. And happy 32nd B day to my bro today Matthew Lee.

Semana Santa 2

Semana Santa is winding down and finishes tomorrow. It´s been a nice long relaxing week.

Thursday night is the ¨big¨ night for the pasos here in Sevilla. Three of the most important pasos are out that night ¨Gran Poder, Macarana, and the Esperanza.¨ It´s intense let me tell you. We did not get home until 7am. There are so many people you literally cannot move if you want to. This is actually kind of a scary thought. As I was standing there, with my rib cage being crushed into a zillion pieces I was thinking, ¨I can´t move!¨haha. I actually almost got into a fight with the girl next to me. She kept turning around and being all like ¨give me space¨ and making mean faces. It was 4am, I had been standing for a zillion hours, and I couldn´t breathe, oh, and the lady next to me was blowing her cigarette smoke directly into my face....and this girl was giving me attitude? I think not. So, I pushed her. I´m serious, don´t mess with me. So she´s all....-#~€~#@€~€¬ and I´m all......$!%$"%·$% ya! And then Antonio stepped in...

My husband is quiet too but he´s the same as me.....if you do something to really piss us off we will not hesitate to kick your ass. It was amazing! In the end no one left with a black eye or anything, but I´m conviced that if I ever was to get into a physical fight I would sooooooo win.

And then the float of Jesus walked by............

that sucks!

Woman Goes for Leg Operation, Gets New Anus Instead
A German retiree is taking a hospital to court after she went in for a leg operation and got a new anus instead, the Daily Telegraph is reporting.
The woman woke up to find she had been mixed up with another patient suffering from incontinence who was to have surgery on her sphincter.
The clinic in Hochfranken, Bavaria, has since suspended the surgical team.
Now the woman is planning to sue the hospital. She still needs the leg operation and is searching for another hospital to do it.

pics

amazing! michael jackson inter.

http://es.youtube.com/watch?v=Jg7ZkKFcTnM

update....

sorry, i´ve been busy getting migraines and going to docs. i have to go to the neurologist in april. sounds scary. i´m sure it´s nothing but a small tumor.

i like having people over to our place, since no americans ever come i have to invite all spaniards. yesterday our friends came with their one mth. old daughter. this reiterated the fact on how desperate i am NOT to get pregnant for a very, very long time. of course whenever there is a baby in the room and there is a female who is married without a child (yours truly) i get the, ¨Oh, and what about you?! When are you guys going to have a baby?¨

me: ¨when semen swim up my vagina, into my uterus (womb) and then into my fallopian tubes where they may join with the tiny egg that i releases from one of my ovaries every month. If this 'joining' (also known as fertilisation or conception) occurs, then i will become pregnant..........in a zillion years.¨

them: ¨so, you haven´t heard mother nature calling?¨

me: ¨she hasn´t even found the phone to start dialing.¨

Semana Santa

Holy week is one of my favorite times here in Sevilla. I encourage you to read about it on google... ¨Sevilla, Semana Santa.¨ It´s way too hard for me to explain!

Sunday night we have a tradition that for the past four years we´ve gone to see ¨La Paz¨ and Cristo enter at the church. It enters at 1am. It´s amazing. They men underneath the paso have to get on their knees so she can fit through the door. It´s quite a sight. The moon was nearly full, all of the orange blossoms are smelling so ridiculously nice and as I stared at Jesus on that cross I knew He was there at that very moment whispering, ¨See how much I love you?¨

shoes

Manuel is my six year old student.

Manuel:Seño, thank GOD you didn´t wear those black shoes again today. You wear those like every day and they are SOOOOO hideous.

Me: Wow. Tell me how you really feel Manuel.

.......

migraine today.......and then my bird bit my finger and now it´s bleeding.

also..

i had another migraine yesterday. i could quite possibly be dying of a brain tumor.

i find it absurd that no one is coming to vist me. ever. people, come on. free room and board. again, absurd that u are not taking advantage. also, who knows how much time i have left with this brain tumor!?

zapatero is spains president. again. i think that´s a good thing. at least he doesn´t speak with a lisp like that other guy.....

sometimes my job turns into therapy sessions. 1 hour of talking about how she left her husband etc. and i´m all, ¨ok, lets get back to phrasal verbs....no, nothing?¨

raspy

I can barely speak after screaming so loud. It´s spring. Spring=cockroaches. I was picking up the towel mat and there it was. I mean, we´re talking gigantic. This cockroach was not messing around. We are talking ¨I could eat your head if I wanted to ¨ type cockroach. And to top it all off, I was naked and vulnerable when I saw this cockroach. I´m surprised I still have two nipples. It could have easily just chomped one of those suckers right off.

I screamed, ran, and slammed the door.

Then had Antonio kill it.

Thank God for husbands.

thought for the day

me in any waiting room

http://es.youtube.com/watch?v=8FS7raCh_uc&feature=email

random thoughts by jack handey

I get a kick out of when people call me by a different name..and of course I don´t correct them. That´s half the fun. One man at the gym thinks my name is Felicia. Why he thinks this I have no idea? I think he mixed my last name in there a little bit and one day he just started calling me Felicia...and he truly believes my name is Felicia. I don´t want to burst his bubble so I´ll just let it slide.

I´m noticing a pattern here after marriage. First, the chic usually cuts her hair after the wedding and honeymoon. She was probably growing it out for some updo hoo ha. Then comes dog hunting. And then....babies. Yowsers. I can´t see me being responsible enough to take care of a baby. I would probably forget to feed it or something.

Speaking of babies. Everytime I read a magazine there is always some new mom..like Christina Aguilera and they always make comments like ¨I´m head over heels in love with my baby.¨ Oh really? That´s surprising. I thought you were going to say, ¨I can´t stand this ugly alien troll and I now have bigger hips because of him.¨

Every Tues and Thur when I walk home from class I pass two Romanian men touching their tamborine. They always yell things at me like¨Guapa¨ and stuff.........and then I punched him.

death

I woke up at 530 am with a migraine. I hate waking up early. I hate migraines. Combine these two things together=nightmare.

I think migraines are like bad kisses. You want to forget they even happened and you def. don´t want another one.

So, I felt like I had a hangover all day today.........even though I didn´t drink a thing. Maybe I should have gone to work drunk. ¨Hi kids!!!!!!!!!!! Lets talk about shots! This one is called a buttery nipple!¨

¨Seño, what´s nipple?!¨

¨I´ll explain that to you in a few years..when you´re nine.¨

Sunday, Sunday

Today was a good day. The weather is ridiculously nice.....close to a whopping 80º today. Only to get hotter. YIPEE! BEAUTIFUL.

We went to church.....always a good way to start a Sunday, and then to the market. I love going to the market because you never know what you are going to see there. Sometimes we see fights and today I saw an eight year old boy smoking. I´m not sure of his exact age but if I had to guess I would say eight. Smoking. A cigarrette. While his parents watched him.

I also get a kick out of the lady that´s probably rounding her 80th B day this year and she sells porn. A big. Huge. Porn. Table. A table of porn. I wish that was my grandma. I´m sure she´d always be offering to take me to the cinema.

We made lunch at our house, I painted and cleaned and now I´m making chocolate chip cookies. My first attempt here in Spain. I brought the chocolate chips from IN (they don´t have them here). Pretty rad!

charlie