It just ain´t right

I just looked at my schedule book and counted the number of weddings for 2007.

I counted 21. No wonder I´m broke! That just ain´t right!

I don´t even want to go to my own!

Depression

I just got a picture of one of my girlfriends who is 3.5 mths pregnant. My stomach is bigger than hers. That just hurts. (tear).

iron THESE

Wow, here there are ridiculously high standards to ironing and making beds. I got yelled at at work about both. ¨You need to pull the sheets so there are no wrinkles.¨ ¨There is a wrinkle in this shirt, iron it again.¨ Then, I got home and I´m ironing my own clothes and Julia was like ¨that´s not how you do it.¨ Here´s the kicker........I DON´T CARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think to American standards my shirt is perfectly fine and as far as ironing the sheets........don´t even get me started. That makes about as much sense as ramming a pencil up my nose. I have much more important things to do with my time than ironing the sheets and towels. Ok, now that I´ve gotten that off my chest.

It´s Feria and I was totally VIPing it last night!I went with a friend and she has a tent and all her friends have tents (You have to have an invite to get in) So you KNOW I was the guest celebrity. Speaking of celebs...we saw quasi celebs last night..the guys that sing ¨Hey Macarena.¨ You KNOW you remember that song with all those crazy dance moves. Ya, they are from here. THEN we went to her very rich friends tent and she has four horses and a carriage so we were totally pimping that out. Also, her friend is a model. Probably the most gorgeous girl I´ve ever seen and she´s in three commercials here right now. She was getting stared at all night long. Next to her I looked like a bat straight out of hell. Oh well.

Pics to follow.

Fun in the park

Sometimes it´s actually liberating living in a country where they don´t understand a word of English. Antonio´s friend, Antonio and I went to the park tonight with the Chiqui. The park is close to a shopping area and about a year ago Hooters was supposed to open up there. I had totally forgotten about that and then Antonio´s friend Sergio said, ¨hooters¨ and it was hilarious. Then we just kept shouting out hooters the whole night to random strangers. He was on his bike and I was behind him and these two girls walked by. I saw his head swivel to the side, his lips said ¨hooters¨ and then his head swiveled back. I had to change my diaper right then and there.

So, later he asked me some other english words and of course I had to teach him boobs, $enis and !agina. You know, the staples.

I told him a good insult is *enis wrinkle. We walked by a supermarket, the glass doors opened and he shouted *enis wrinkle at the top of his lungs.

I´ve never had more fun at the park than tonight. My duty here is done. Long live America.

........

I get a lot of junk mail in my inbox. Today I was deleting them as always and I stopped when I came across the subject line: Sara Fisel stop being bald. Well then...I never knew I was bald. Why didn´t someone tell me after all these years?


Did you know that flamingos can fly? I honestly had no idea. Then, a few nights ago we were watching this documentary about them, because apparently they are from here, (and i am a total loser) and I almost choked on my tongue when they headed to the clouds. WHOA when did that happen? I thought they were just pink and pretty and bended their legs every once in awhile. Of course A looked at me like, ¨Are you serious?¨Ya, I am! So, if you didn´t know that they could fly, now you do. I can die happy having taught you that.

horse appeal

I had never been to the bull ring here in Sevilla. Until today! Relax, I didn´t go to a bullfight ( I think I would cry). Feria has begun! Soon you will see me in pics of my dress..again! But, today was the horse show! All of the carriages that are at the Feria went to the bullring today and there was a two hour show. It was awesome! Besides the fact that I didn´t know we were going, I wore a long sleeve black shirt, it´s a zillion degrees and I burnt my neck. Other than that...super! I´ve always loved horses and I WILL own one some day!

There are carriages that have one horse, up to five or six!!!

Here are some pics. Enjoy. Happy Sunday!

workout?

I just got back from the gym. I gotta tell ya, it´s hilarious. I think most Spanish girls in general just really have no clue how to workout. They have super long hair and they wear it down, they wear jeans, sometimes sweats and the maximum time I´ve ever seen a girl on a machine is ten minutes...max! And sweating...ya right...what´s that? They are also never alone, the usually come in pairs of twos or threes.

There is a certain machine that I like and there are only two of them. Today there were two girls ¨working out¨and I just wanted to tap one on the shoulder and say, ¨Excuse me, could you please step aside and let me show you how American girls workout.¨ But of course I didn´t do that and ate a donut instead. No, not really, I just had to wait and in the meantime I asked her if she needed to borrow a hair tie.

Perfect Timing

so, I just got back from taking chiqui on a walk. she decided to take a dump in the middle of the crosswalk and stop traffic. smart move chiqui, smart move.

Clip

http://sjl.funnyordie.com/v1/view_video.php?viewkey=3efbc24c7d2583be6925


This is the funniest thing I´ve ever seen in my entire life. I´m still wiping the tears way.

The new and improved...

George Bush and Bill Clinton

Let Freedom Ring

Crack open the bottle of champagne, summon the choir, lets rent a ferrari and ride into freedom town!!!!


I finally did it! I told them I´m finished with the job in June. Only two more months of poopie diapers, screaming babies, spitup, and icky baby food. No more making beds or washing sheets. No more ironing or dusting. No more cleaning toilets on a daily basis or vacuuming. PTL!

Tommorow´s highlights....all of the jobs I´ve had in my 26 years of life. Stay tuned!

oh the shame

I just got done with my workout. Ok, no big deal. The shame:I was totally jamming to Paris Hiltons ¨Nothing in this world.¨

I can´t believe I´m admitting this to the internet.

portugal 3

portugal 2

I´m getting married in four months from today. Ah!

We just got back from buying our entire kitchen. Woot toot!

More pics from P town..

Portugal 1

Some things about Portugal:

The TV in our hotel room was only in German. There´s a lot of ¨ein¨ in that language.

I saw a bearded lady. I think she escaped from the circus for a day or two.

They drive like mad. I´m actually surprised we are still alive.

They like VERY vibrant bright colors. Especially blue.

We went to the movies and were surprised when the show stopped and ¨intermission¨ flashed across the screen. This makes sense if we would have been watching Dances with Wolves..but a normal 1.5 hour movie...prb. not necessary.

Why don´t they make a book that´s called, ¨I´m just not that into planning my wedding.¨


Are my comments working? Why? Because I haven´t gotten one in oh say, a decade.

website

Everyone is making wedding websites and you KNOW I can´t stand being left out. So weep no more.....

http://www.theknot.com/ourwedding/sarafisel&antonioluque

Sunday Best

Just got back from Portugal, I´ll write more about that later.

Here are the best dressed eggs in town. This is my 3rd Easter here in spain and my mom finally sent me an egg coloring kit. It was hard to explain to my family about the easter bunny and why we color eggs. The first question was, ¨Why are there eggs if bunnies don´t even lay eggs?¨ Who knows!!!!!!! I just have fun coloring them and I used to LOVE getting my easter basket in the morning with tons of goodies. None of that really matters though...the only thing that really DOES matter is that Christ is alive!!!!!!!!

Happy Easter!

entertainment

Today at work I was doing something else so I couldn´t pick up Ángel at the exact moment he wanted and he was whining like an injured puppy. I looked at him and said, and I quote, ¨Tough Titties.¨ He sort of looked at me, I looked at him and then I started laughing so hard I thought I was going to create a six pack in a matter of minutes. (On top of the one I already have of course). First of all, who says tough titties? Second of all, to an eight month old baby. I´m obviously going to be THE BEST mom EVA´!

Then I got to thinking, where in the heck do the phrases come from that we use? Maybe it´s just in IN..I know: ¨It´s hotter than a popcorn fart out there¨ is def one of my favorites. Speaking of boobs...¨It´s colder than a witches tit¨ is another classic. Are any of these ringing a bell or is this just my crazy lunatic family that says these things?

Dagnabit is a favorite of my dads.

Here in the region that I live ¨andalucia¨ EVERYTHING is spoken as a simile or something similar.

One of my personal favorites, ¨Ella esta mas blanca que la teta de una monja.¨ Translation: She´s whiter than a nuns boob. You know it´s funny.

So, it´s like Friday for me today.......spring break! Tomorrow we head to Portugal until Sunday. You know I´m wearing my itsy bitsy teenie weenie yellow polka dot bikini. (I just wanted to type weenie).

Worlds greatest mother to be,
slf

note

Recently, I found out that 3 friends of mine are pregnant and due in October.
What a fabulous way to save on our liquor bill at the wedding. Note to all women coming to my wedding: GET PREGNANT!

pics galore

incense is in the air. it´s semana santa time again. holy week that is.

sadly, pancho left us on thur night. enclosed are pics of stuff. enjoy