Ode to MJ

Oh MJ where art thou?

It was 12:30 am and A was listening to the radio. He rolls over and says to me, ¨Did you know that Michael Jackson just died?¨ Wait..what? Give me a moment. I´m supposed to sleep now? I dreamt of moonwalks, white gloves, and crotch grabs. The hotter MJ his Thriller days.

Back in the 80´s my parents owned a sticker store and I had every Michael Jackson pin/sticker that was ever made. Maybe those would be worth money these days? I should look it up! We had the Thriller album and I would stare at the cover. MJ all hot and sexy in his white suite with that Tiger next to him. How dangerous! Again..I was like..four.

I think he´s had a rough life and really was the king of pop. All legends die too young.

This one is for you Mike (doing the moonwalk across my parkay floor).

whoa

So, twice a week I teach a private class at a home. They are sisters 6 and 7 and a brother 9. These kids fart more than anyone I know. I mean.. a lot. Constantly. And they are always silent. Yesterday I was reading a book and the girls were sitting on my lap. All the sudden it smelled like sulfur. ..and I wanted to die. SO GROSS. I think it burnt a hole in my skirt.


Things are fine around here. I start summer school next week and I have to be here by eight thirty am. I am not looking fwd to that. Next year I´ve already decided I will be leaving at the beginning of July. It´s just too hot and I´ve gotten two migraines in the past few days thanks to the bright bright sun!

true story

as you know it´s like over 100º here and i just got done working out. i was pretty sweaty and my shirt was wet from the belly button down. from the belly button up it was pretty dry besides these two perfectly round circles where my........well, u get the picture.

how embarrassing! and H I L A R I O U S

maybe no one noticed??

patience is a virtue

and i ain't got none. i just waited for a half and hour in the line because i wanted to change my euros to dollars. so, it's finally my turn and it turns out they didn't even have dollars. swell. i don't get that about banks. the line is out the door and there is always a maximum of two people working. all the others are on coffee breaks or something. and the two people that were at this bank were at least eighty years old. slow slow slow!

so, i went to another bank and there was only one lady in front of me. score! ya, i still waited for fifteen minutes! she was telling the guy her whole life story, talking about vacation, etc. i just had to laugh. good thing i wasn't really in that big of a hurry but what a waste of forty five minutes! at least the guy called me senorita instead of senora!

the exchange rate is freaking awesome right now though. 1050 euros are 1,500 dollars. YIPEE (that is if i ever find anyone to change it for me!)

beach bums

So, it's officially hot in Sevilla and we head to the BEACH!

It was over one hundred today but surprisingly at the beach I had goosebumps at some point. YES

I walk, read, and listen to music and A fishes ..he loves it! Too bad he didn't catch anything. ha!

I was sitting there and A's all " Those people are naked!" What the...so, I turned and looked and the couple..oh, in their thirties decided to go skinnydipping. What the? I didn't realize I had come to a nude beach. Luckily they were far enough away that I didn't have to see them. She did walk by us a few times with a thong and topless. Lets just say...not a good idea. I could have done without that and I almost threw up my lunch.

So, I thought I'd escaped the naked people and as we're walking to our car two forty year old men were playing PADDLE BALL...drum roll please.............NAKED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh. My. Gosh. Are u serious? Are you serious right now? To top it all off their NAKED wives were sitting there cheering on their bouncy balls-penises. Ok. I know I live in Europe and I understand that there are lots of topless beaches..but honestly...now we have just gotten out of control. Naked men playing paddle? Is that really necessary? If I had a child I would shield their eyes..........but seriously...how could I not laugh? Could YOU have not laughed?
Is it too much to ask to enjoy a day at the beach without seeing skin flutes flying all over the place?!!!!!!!!

HOTNESS

It´s officially 45º C in Sevilla today which is flipping hot. I think that´s roughly about oh 102º F. Ridiculous!

Changing topics...

It´s interesting because out of the oh..say ten blogs I read about six months back HALF of them announced they were prego...and due in June. 2 of them have yet to pop, but 4 have.

Congrats to my friends and their new babies:
Caroline
Ruby
Hudson
and Jackson!!!!!

stomach!!

I hate my stomach!

Yesterday AGAIN some of my adult students were like¨ And that stomach!???¨ I HAVE A GUT..get over it!!!

Guess the Engagement Ring!

Isn´t it sad that I just took a quiz on people.com ¨guess the engagement ring¨ and I got 9/9 right? Pathetic! I have way too much time on my hands!

randoms...

Oh Mr. Migraine aren´t you just hilarious. You have been torturing me since I was eleven. Haven´t I paid my dues you freaking A HOLE LEAVE ME ALONE!

Ok, now that I got that off my chest.

I saw a rainbow today which always makes me very happy. They are just so rare and beautiful.

I wanted to say CONGRATS to my friends Kelly and Amy and their new beautiful little girl Caroline Mary Ball. I pray that she´s happy and healthy and leads a very fulfilling life. What great parents she has!!!!!!!!!!!!!

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0086034/ (check this out!) IT IS TRUE about the Octopussy!!!!!!!!! OMG HILARIOUS! What were they thinking?!!!!!!!!!!

Octo What?

Before I forget.........does everyone get goose bumps when they sneeze or is that just me?

How did this even come about...ah.. yes. Today I wrote on the chalkboard

¨How would your life be different if you had four arms?¨

Then that is when all the octopus talk started and one girl said ¨Octopussy¨ but like totally serious...and then the girl sitting next to her said ¨pussy¨ oh, I don´t know like FIVE TIMES! I mean, imagine being in a classroom and grown adults just start saying pussy like it ain´t no thing but a chicken wing. HIlarious. I crossed my legs cuz I almost wet myself and they are all ¨What What?¨ So, I went over to the board and wrote PUSSY=Coño and they just. about. died.

We all had a good laugh/cry and then they claimed that a James Bond movie was named ¨Octopussy¨ I do not believe them, do you?

almost 18 mths...

charlie is getting so big!

sizzle

It´s already officially HOT. And HOT=cockroach season. KILL ME NOW! I think we´re already up to six or seven at this point and the season is still young. WHY ME? These are moments when I think Sevilla was not a wise choice. I can hear them before I see them scurrying around like they own the place. How dare them!! Then my knight and shining armor comes running to the rescue with a giant shoe and SPLAT. Aww. What a sweet husband I have.

SON OF A..

Yesterday around 8pm I was taking a nice leisure bike ride to meet a friend and CRUNCH I f"""ing got hit by a car. Basically we were both going really slow because it was at a cross walk for PEDESTRIANS and or bike riders and obviously the car had to stop...I just assumed he would. Ya, I guess not. Some Fer in a BMW and I hope I scratched the heck out of it. I didn´t fall off the bike or anything but my ankle is bruised and hurts like a mother. I didn´t really know what to do so I just kept going! Hilarious now that I think of it but I was like trembling and I didn´t want to kick the guy in the nads or start a fight so I just peddled off. As I did I turned around to look at him and he was giving ME a dirty look. The nerve......No ¨Oh my gosh I´m so sorry are you ok?¨ NOTHING......he was like angry at me.....I am still in shock. I peddled around the corner and basically got off my bike and almost cried...but then I just got mad. A HOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!