STOP

I´ve become so domesticated, although I do have a T shirt that says ¨domestically disabled.¨ I admit, I´m not a cooker, but I am a baker. Besides, I´d take chocolate chip cookies over meatloaf anyday. The dough alone can be dinner... at least for 3 nights. I do laundry, I iron, I clean the house, I clean all of the animal cages. By the way, our canary Fran started to sing last week. It´s been two straight months of chirping...thank goodness he´s found his singing voice, it´s much prettier. So anyways ya, I just thought I´d let all of you know that I´m very capable of doing a load of laundry WHILE mopping the floor. Impressive, I know.

Usually when you haven´t seen someone for awhile you´re like, ¨Hey, it´s good to see you.¨ Not here. They´re like, ¨Hey haven´t seen you in awhile, you got fat.¨ It´s true folks, they talk about weight like they talk about the weather and it drives me insane. Ok, I mean if you want to tell me I look skinnier, I´ll accept the compliment, but fatter....just keep that one to yourself, or talk about me when I´m not around.

I picked olives today, it was liberating. They look like grapes. I´ve never picked olives in my life. I love doing things that I´ve never done before, it´s exciting and I must admit I´m becoming kind of a nature buff. With the sky and the ¨Simpsons¨ clouds but I could do without the flies though. They buzz in my ear and fly up my nose. It´s just about as comfortable as going to the gyno. I´d rather die than have a fly up my nose or in my ear. Just kill me now. Anyways, so as I´m picking olives this stray dog came over and it was so sad I almost cried. It was like a greyhound and the poor fellow was so skinny his little ribs were sticking out. Who just dumps their dogs? I don´t like you mean people, go suck on a lemon.

I went running in the park again today. I bought this slick Nike running shirt. It´s kinda tight. So, I got stared at a lot because I´m tall and white, I had a tight shirt on, and I was wearing work out clothes. This equation equals staring. I´m not sure Spanish women ever work out. Maybe they were just born with the skinny gene ? I´ve never seen them running in the park anyways. All of the people running are americans, it´s obvious. I hate that stare though, you know the full body scan, UP; DOWN, then back up again. UGH. Talk about uncomfortable. They try to be sly about it too. Nice try.

Also, crossing the street. At the crosswalks they are supposed to stop because there are little zebra stripes on the road. So, I´m halfway across the street and then a car buzzes by and they give me ¨the wave.¨ What the heck does this wave mean ? 1)Sorry I have no patience and I almost ran over you 2)Please forgive me for almost killing you 3)I´m an idiot please excuse me 4)I was born with bad hair and bad eyesight sorry.

I don´t know....but stop with the wave already! And stop at the dang crosswalks!

Trying to avoid being run over,
Sara