battle scars

I think I´m going to be a horrible mother. Today as I was taking the twins on a walk I bent over to pick a rock out of the wheel because it kept making this horrible screeching sound. You know, like Freddy Krougers nails against the chalk board. So, I´m bending over and trying to get the rocks out and I´m not realizing that I´m pushing the stroller. Ya, I ran into a tree, with the two kids inside and I ´m positive this other couple saw me. But, the kids just kept on sleeping so I obviously didn´t run into the tree THAT hard. I think I heard the guy bad mouth me but you know what..who cares? So I ran into a tree with two live children in the stroller...BIG HONKIN Deal. It could have been worse...a moving car for instance. I mean...a tree. They survived, right?

Yesterday I was changing ángels diaper because he had a little surprise for me. So, as I was changing it and just when I had him in the position when you grab both legs to wipe the bootie... ...cccchhhhhoooooooommmmmmmmmmm super poop squirted all over. It was like an electric shock went through his body. So, after I got all of that cleaned up and everything under control....wizzzzzzzz he starts to pee all over the place. AND I had the top drawer of the changer open so he peed all over the clean clothes that I had just washed and ironed and left a huge puddle on the floor. Excellent.

I freaking need a gas mask and a wet suit the next time I go into battle.