I couldn´t make this up if I tried.

So, yesterday I went to the gyno.

We are still dealing with fertility issues and I am trying to figure out what to do.

Anyways, I´m sitting there watching gross parents with gross kids run around (and of course she was pregnant again) and I had to fart.

This is any girls worst nightmare thinking about farting in the doctors face when your legs are up in stirrups.


There was no one around so I walked down the hallway and farted. I figured it would be better to fart in the hallway instead of in his face.


Then it felt wet.

That´s weird.

I went to the bathroom and had SHIT everywhere. Awesome. I took off my pants, threw my underwear away and usually in Spain there is no toilet paper. Ever. Panic set in.

THANK GOD there were a few squares and I had to manage. I always keep kleenex in my purse too and I only had ONE.

I also had a bottle of water in my purse so I figured I would dump some water on the kleenex and I could clean better.

The water bottle fell into the toilet.

WTF?!

In the end I cleaned up as best as I could and rubbed raspberry hand cleanser on my thighs. That smells better than shit, right?

So there I was, in the stirrups with my grill in his face.

Hope it didn´t stink!