Did you say THONG?

After four consecutive days at the gym (cardio and weights) and four days of my new Pilates video, I feel like my body is an overly cooked package of Ramen noodles that was left out for the birds to peck at with their sharp, curved beaks. I can´t move. Hmm. Today at the gym was interesting. The gym monitors are hysterical. They are all these huge bulky muscles with legs walking around like they are King Kong. (King Kong is smarter) So, here in Spain there are some phrases that I absolutely cannot STAND hearing and one is ¨me cago en tus muertos¨ and ¨me cago en Dios¨ Basically, the first one means I poop on your dead kin and the second one is I poop on God. Hmm. Hearing these phrases is like Freddy´s nails against a chalkboard, not so pleasant. I´m sure the dead wouldn´t mind..their dead. And God...He´s smart enough to move out of the way. Don´t you think? So anyways, basically when people talk like this I know their idiots. There´s no questions, so I treat them like idiots. I basically gave the guy the death look..I mean, what an idiot. I hope he dies...and then I´ll poop on him.

Antonio and I went to this thrift shop today because he had to have a new sweatshirt, zipper hoody thing to work out in. Here´s a fact..Did you know that zippers are on opposite sides..U.S. and Spain?! Betcha didn´t! Why? If you know I will pay you 1 Billion dollars.

So, we´re walking down this aisle and it just happened to be the aisle for little boys and girls underwear. I looked at him and said ¨you realize we look like total pervs looking at childrens underwear¨ And then I saw it. Unmistakably the most amazing, horrifying, and saddest thing my two lovely eyes have ever laid their pupils on. .........................................................

A BABY THONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I´m not even joking folks...this is too serious to joke about. There were thongs for babies and little girls. Ok, the line has just been crossed folks. I mean, are you serious? Can you imagine a little girl of four years old saying, ¨Mommy, can I please wear my thong today?¨ Wow, is all I´m left with. That´s it, just a wow. I walked away never wanting to have children. I mean, when I have children what if a thong is their only option? I don´t want to bring a child into that kind of world.

Went to Starbucks tonight. It was cool until I looked over and saw the woman sitting at the table next to mine wiping the poop from her babies butt hole right in front of me. Now it´s ok to change babies poopie diapers in public places. Amazing. She probably was wearing a thong diaper.

Also, what´s up with parents covering their babies strollers in plastic covering? If it´s rainy, or just cold, parents COVER their babies strollers with plastic. Ok, suffocation anyone? I always want to run over there and rip it off and scream, ¨LET YOUR CHILD BREATHE¨ But, I just walk by and suffer for that particular child in silence. Hope they don´t die. Save the child!

Banning children thongs for life,
SF